Why change the habits of a lifetime? Because the old habits made me miserable

Published December 9, 2011 by Crystal

It’s Friday evening. Not only that, but it’s Friday 9th December. The second Friday of the official party season! The time of year where secretaries are drunkenly snogging their boss secretly in the closet. The time of year where drink o’clock starts at noon, and is all but obligatory.
So what party am I preparing, preening and primping myself for? What Christmas event am I about to set out the door for?

Absolutely none.

And I am perfectly content with that. I am actually home with my youngest little man who has the sniffles. My older two are at a pantomime with gran, and my husband, well he is out at a works do, where I sincerely hope he won’t be having a secret snog 😉

For almost as long as I can remember, up until about 2 weeks ago, I’ve had a bottle of wine on a Friday night, and a Saturday, maybe a Sunday……and some other day of the week. I’ve drunk with friends, I’ve drunk without. I’ve drunk with people who I realise now were pretty much friends purely because of our drinking capabilities and not much else, and over time, when you realise there are shallow relationships, that in itself brings a sadness that can lead you to drink more or faster, and simply in the worst possible state of mind.
But a couple of weeks ago, I decided I wanted a break, and so did my liver and my bank balance. And it has been a pretty smooth transition. In the last 3 weeks I have had one bottle of wine and half a guinness. And I feel so much better for it! I wake up clear headed, I don’t wake in the middle of the night panicking over some teeny little problem I can’t possibly deal with at 3am. I’m not having to groan or apologise over things I’ve said or done, and my whole world is full of clarity!
Drinking can be fun. It can be relaxing, social, healthy to a degree! But it can also mask a host of problems, and when we use it to mask things, we can never see the full picture. And I’m liking seeing the whole picture.
Of course, I can’t stay pious forever. I’m late night shopping on Thursday and I intend to have a glass or two to celebrate successful shopping. And with family and friends to socialise with over the following weekend, I don’t doubt a glass or two will be downed!
But for now, for this quiet Friday, I’m enjoying having broken that wine drinking habit. Now to put the kettle on and enjoy a nice herbal tea!

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2 comments on “Why change the habits of a lifetime? Because the old habits made me miserable

  • I can relate to this. I went from being a heavy drinker in my 20s to being an occasional drinker in my 30s, and no, in my 40s, I’m a moderate drinker. A glass of wine a couple of times a week, hangovers are, for the most part, a thing of the past, and I don’t have the worry that I will become my mother.

    • Yes I think there was a family concern I would turn into my grandmother. I know I’m one of those who can’t leave a bottle half full. If it’s open I will drink. At least for now. I am hoping, over time that this won’t last, and that I will be able to buy a bottle and drink a glass. But I know, having moved out of the fog of regular drinking I feel much better for it!

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