Feeling good today. Amazing what magic the sun can do! Got a maxi dress, covering a multitude of bumps! It is not, however, covering a multitude of sins. My lumps and bumps do not determine me to be a bad person. The naughty things I think and do will determine that ;-).
When you surround yourself with positive people and language, it has a positive effect on your life. If you surround yourself with people obsessed with the superficial, with those who believe your worth is based in how you look, what you wear, how you exercise and how you eat, you will be knocked down, and have your self worth depleted all those times you don’t fit into their ideals.
But since February things have been very up and down. I was training for the Moonwalk (completed it, and have signed up to attempt to run a half marathon!), I was believing I should concentrate on my food a bit, and got sucked in to the belief that Weight Watchers would work this time! Damn it I would make it work!
A few monetary pounds shorter, but no pounds lighter, I realised that yet again I’d been sucked in to the delusion that life would be so much better if only I were thinner!
Truth is, life is pretty darn good. I have a beautiful family. I now surround myself with people that support each other and love each other, and trust each other. I am taking the plunge and going for a college course. I am coming out of another well of depression, and I am learning to run on my terms, without some fit bod breathing down my neck. Food and drink aren’t the big issue they become when I follow those diet plans. And I’m not measuring my self worth by the reaction of someone next to a set of scales. We choose what we focus on in life. When we succumb to the media portrayal of the “ideal”, we can start to attempt changing ourselves. The magazines that tell you how “Michelle lost 2 stone and now has the ideal bikini body” aren’t showing you the real life activity of those people. You’re not seeing the highs and lows of their day to day life. My favourite quote at this moment is;
“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” —Steve Furtick
Those magazines aren’t celebrating the very human differences that our bodies have. An hourglass woman is never going to lose her bum and bust. She is beautiful in her shape and should embrace it! The woman fretting she has no bum and little bust has assets all of her own, she can achieve looks and activities that the other lady can’t. Neither is the superior shape. Neither is more desirable to humanity. Why are we looking to what the media says is the right way to look? Why are we giving our power away to a mostly male profession of fashion “leaders and creators”?
Step away from the negative voices. The ones telling you what to eat, how to exercise, who to follow. Take time to ask yourself what you want in life. If you can, avoid the celebrity gossip that is making you question yourself. Look for literature and groups that support women in all their forms. Not because you’re “giving up” but because you’re not putting up with the lies anymore. You are wonderful.