It’s so hard watching loved ones go through pain and heartache. You want to take the upset and anger away, and tell them everything will be ok. And when you’re outside looking in, the picture you see might be very different to what they are experiencing. Sometimes it’s so easy to want to advise and say stop doing what you’re doing, it won’t help!
This morning I have been reminded though that my journey is not theirs. And my advice, however well intentioned is not for them. So for you and to you, friend, I apologise. You are on your journey and have your own lessons and experiences to get out of this world. We are on very different paths, even though we walk side by side.
I get angry with unsolicited advice. I’ve blogged in the past about it as a recipient here and my rant led to someone taking offence.
Someone seeking your counsel is very different to you telling them what they should or shouldn’t do. Maybe I’m right, maybe I’m wrong. What works for me might not work for them and vice versa.
Unsolicited advice makes assumptions that the recipient is ignorant, or doesn’t know or understand enough, it assumes the giver knows better! Perhaps the giver has plenty of experience and a degree in the situation! But giving this unwanted advice robs the recipient of their chance to find out what is best for them in their life.
I promise I will try, very hard, to stop myself the next time I want to advise….but every so often we can forget our own rules for such things and get it wrong, and sometimes we need a lesson of our own. xxx