The big black dogs have finally jumped onto the bed after a week of trailing at my heels. Today I feel smothered by them. Weighted down. Exhausted yet numb. It’s been about 4 months since the last hit. And I don’t really know the reason this time around. Exhaustion? Anxiety? Change of situation? I don’t know. Maybe right now I am trying to find an explanation for something that doesn’t need a reason to bound in and ruin things every so often? At least now I know that it won’t swallow me up. That it will pass. One day at a time for now. One for in front of the other and one small task as and when. But it bloody sucks. It’s crap. And I hate it. Hello depression, old foe. Did you get lonely up there in the loft?