I am feeling tetchy and anxious and weepy and miserable today. I feel pain and discomfort from food choices yesterday, and I feel failings for not tuning in to me more.
So of course the default setting of my life? Look For some food plan that will help. Because yet again I am doubting myself and my ability to take care of my own needs. After all, so many messages out there are that we cannot trust ourselves. That we need someone to tell us what to eat and drink. And when. And how much. And with those voices come others alongside telling us to cut carb. Or sugar. Or meat. Or dairy. Or chocolate. Or wine. Or to eat more goji berries. Or more spinach. Or more raw food.
Isn’t it tedious? And is it any wonder I am confused and every so often fall for some of the flannel some of the time?
The realisation is that dieting does not work for me for any length of time. But a big thing that I have taken from the diet clubs is the phrase;
No one plans to fail, but we can fail to plan
It may be twee. It may be a little cutesy. But this weekend I can relate. If I had been slightly more organised I would not have had quite so many bagels. I love bagels. But they don’t love me back. Along with the burger buns. And the onion rings. A lot of beige. A lot of highly processed. And as a result some gallbladder pain, intestinal discomfort, and horrid bloating.
But you don’t want to hear about that. So instead I shall tell you my plans. Cookbooks. Not all the cookbooks I own. Not by any means. But my old faithful and a couple of new to peruse for inspiration as I try to plan a week that will leave me feeling vibrant. Just because I am no longer following slimming world, or weight watchers, doesn’t mean I can’t take and tweak ideas from the books. And The Hairy Dieters is a wonderful thing! There isn’t a recipe I haven’t liked so far (except I don’t love the leek lasagne but I can forgive that for the pasties and korma! ). The Cook Yourself Thin books are also inspiring! The carbonara is heaven on a plate.
So I shall peruse and write a shopping list and menu plan. And I shall put the weekend behind me.
I shall also keep listening to my slimpod and enjoy the gentleness of the voice and the calming it brings.
This week is Eating Disorders Awareness Week. And most definitely not the week to be harsh and self critical! There is always a new day tomorrow.